Bless Me, Father
by Lathspell Stormcrow
Summary: Confessions are often part of a person’s everyday life. But what if they were part of the life of a LOTR character? What might they possibly have to confess? Sorry for the horrible summary, but I never was good at them. Just a little dabble...
1. Anger Confession

**Warnings: **Slightly odd material. Very A-U, very disturbing to some people. Especially, perhaps, for a few picky Christians out there. So if, from the Summary, you can already tell that there may be some material in here that may be offensive to someone, please DO NOT read this story. It's just a lame little idea I thought up on a rainy night…

**Disclaimer: **Tolkien's characters belong to Tolkien. In this case, Elrond belongs to Tolkien, and the priest belongs to…well, no one. Probably just me, eh?

**Anger Confession**

"Have a seat."

A look of slight guilt. Uncertainty. Nervousness.

The small, wooden stool creaked quietly in protest as the robed figure sat down silently upon it, giving it little strain, but enough so that the poor piece of wood had enough pressure to complain.

The dark-haired head turned slowly toward the small window in the wooden door, the soothing candlelight from the nearby altar reflecting gently in the black tresses that fell in graceful locks and braids down the elf's shoulders and about his face, only partially concealing the quiet look of anxiety on the ageless face.

"Begin." The aged, patient voice from behind the little window spoke coaxingly to the nervous figure outside. One he could not see well for the small wooden designs criss-crossing the tiny window, but one he knew was present nonetheless.

"Bless me Father, for I have sinned." The elf spoke quietly, folding his long hands over his lap and keeping his head bowed as he said the words. "It has been…several years since my last confession."

"I see." The voice replied calmly from the other side of the window. "So tell me then, my child, what sins do you bring before the Lord today?"

The look on the formerly nervous-looking elf's face turned to vague annoyance at the title he had been given, but he said nothing of it as his hands tightened and he spoke once more. "I am…experiencing severe emotional disorders." He said quietly. "…disorders from anger…severe anger."

"Go on." The voice urged on patiently.

The figure made a slightly strained face, pain coming to the gray eyes briefly as his fingers started playing plucking neurotically at the hems of his sleeves. "Anger that has brought…well, licentious thoughts to my mind, along with the contemplation of considerable bodily harm."

At that, one bushy gray eyebrow went up upon the face of the priest sitting behind the window. "Bodily harm? And whom were these thoughts directed to, my child?"

Again, another annoyed fidget. "A…a man I know. Human, in fact." The elf cast his eyes downward briefly as he finally made a mental note to stop fidgeting with his clothing, and instead started distractedly working at smoothing out the wrinkles he had now created in the velvety fabric. "A human who is to be my future son-in-law, if all should bode well for Middle Earth…"

"Your _future _son-in-law?" The priest asked again, sounding just a bit puzzled now. "So he is to marry your daughter then?"

"Yes." The elf replied softly. "Within the year."

"Ah, well, that is to be understood." The voice replied from the other side of the door. "Losing a daughter to another man is often very difficult for the parent. But do you feel no joy at this joining between them?"

"How am I to feel such joy when she is giving up her life for it?" The elf replied quietly again, sounding just a bit emotional now as he spoke.

The priest turned his head just slightly so he could catch a peek at the face of the speaker in front of him. His eyes softened when he saw the teary glimmer in the gray-eyed gaze still directed toward the ground. "Ah, yes." He said with a nod, folding his own hands and turning his eyes away once more. "Yet another marriage between the races of elves and men. I had quite forgotten that that was an issue in the matrimony."

"I can see that." The elf replied, raising a sleeve to swiftly dab his eyes before looking up again bravely at the ceiling and folding his hands tightly against his lap as if to try and stay the remaining tears. "But now I feel this terrible anger toward Aragorn…an anger that nearly led me to striking him when I last encountered him in Rivendell. I could have hit him clean across the yard, but I managed to restrain myself. Is that…is that a terrible sin, Father? Am I never to be forgiven for what I have felt?"

"No, no, nothing like that, my child." The priest replied as compassionately as the holy ones come. "God forgives all. Baleberries, he forgave the Romans didn't he?"

"Well, yes…"

"Now, you pay attention to me, Elrond." The priest continued speaking, steepling his fingers and giving the elf outside a calculating look. "I suggest that you pray hard about this, and accept God's forgiveness into your heart. And try to look upon your daughter's marriage from the very best point-of-view…"

"But she is going to DIE!" Elrond shouted out so unexpectedly that the priest jumped a few inches and a few candles waved timidly behind the stool. "How am I to give over these feelings when I am NEVER GOING TO SEE MY CHILD AGAIN? WHAT KIND OF CONFESSION WILL EVER REMOVE THE ANGER I FEEL TOWARD THAT GOD-FORSAKEN MORTAL WHO IS _SENTANCING MY DAUGHTER TO DEATH?_"

"Um…well…that is why I said you should _pray_…" The now-vaguely-intimidated priest replied shakily – but found himself nose-to-nose with an elven dagger that had been stuck right through the window merely inches from his wizened face. "Er…all right then…why don't you have a seat now, Mr. Peredhil?"

It took a moment of stiff silence, but at last Elrond seemed to deflate, sinking back onto the stool now with a slightly more audible creak than there had been before. "Blessed Spirit, I am already condemned to the Great Void…"

"Well, if you continue in your behavioral patterns that are purely a result of anger and lack of self-control, I would say that that very well may be your outcome." The priest responded in a slightly gruff tone, arranging himself carefully on his seat again and looking out at the elf with a critical eye. "Have you ever considered _talking _with your son-in-law about this?"

"_Future _son-in-law."

"All right, _future_ son-in-law."

"No."

"Why not?"

"Because I fear that if I should see him again, I will not be able to restrain myself from hurting him as I was able to do before."

"I see. What if you have a friend go along with you? Do you have any friends, Elrond?"

"Yes…Glorfindel and Erestor…they are good to me, but I fear that they will not trust me either…"

"Good friends always give each other a second chance."

"Most of the time."

"Indeed."

Sighing slightly, the priest sank back against his chair and rubbed his stubbly chin thoughtfully. "So what do you plan to do about this then, Elrond? Will you try talking with Mr. Aragorn?"

Elrond gave a small sigh, his hands fidgeting unconsciously with his crimson robes once more. "I will…if you think that is best…"

"I do." The priest responded, a vaguely relieved smile coloring his face as he said this. "Now, go on. Come back when you have done this, and you may tell the Lord how it went."

Elrond nodded, standing to his feet and giving the priest another nod of gratitude before raising his eyes to the golden, beautifully presented crucifix that hung before the wall of the church, crossing himself, and then turning to leave at last.

Leaving the poor old priest himself to pull out the well-placed dagger from the small window.

**Please review! I know, I know, you're probably all freaked out now after reading something as bizarre as that…so make yourselves some hot chocolate with lots of fluffy marshmallows and go watch Lord of the Rings to recover yourselves. But who knows? There may just be another chapter to add to this one if I know you all liked this one…**


	2. Greed Confession

**Warnings: **Slightly disturbing material, a scary moment, and guilt. Hee hee. It's a confession, guys! Wake up and smell the One Ring!

**Disclaimer: **Same as in chapter 1. Priest may still be considered mine, but Elrond is Tolkien's and this next character is Tolkien's too. :)

A/N: Thanks for the reviews! You guys are WAY cool…and the greatest inspiration ever for another chappie! Yehaw!   
Greed Confession 

"Have a seat."

A look of great guilt. Uncertainty. Nervousness.

The little wooden stool again creaked in feeble protest as a small figure sat down upon it, but did not give way despite the noises it made. Stools have a way of doing that.

The priest on the other side of the small window in the door sat down upon his own chair, smoothing out his white robes with his gnarled hands and reclining in his own small seat before looking out through the decorated window that had skillfully been repaired after its last attack and over to the smaller figure sitting on the stool that he actually had to bend his neck down a bit to see.

But the priest never judged people by their appearances, so instead he sat back again, and gave a nod. "Begin."

"Bless me Father, for I have sinned." The hobbit spoke in a hushed tone, his head bowed as he spoke and a look of quiet guilt upon his small, round face. "I…I bring the sin of greed to the throne of the Lord."

The priest raised an eyebrow. "Ah, I see. And where does this greed come from, my child? Do you know what has caused it?"

"I dare not speak its name." The hobbit whispered, his large blue eyes closing tightly and his hands clenching together so forcefully it almost seemed painful. "For to speak it would only bring further temptation upon me."

"Hmmm. Indeed." The priest murmured quietly, rubbing his chin and leaning forward slightly in his seat so as better to see out the small window. "Well, this is obviously quite serious. Can you tell nothing of what causes you this feeling of want, my child?"

"Something of great evil." The hobbit replied, his curly head still bowed as he spoke, and his hands entwining with each other nervously. "I…I was sent to destroy it…but I feel that I cannot part with it. Like it's…it's mine, my own…my…um…"

"Your…what?" The priest coaxed gently, urging the small figure on as he spoke of the rather anxious subject.

"…my precious." The hobbit finally finished meekly.

"Your precious?" The priest asked, now looking just a bit disconcerted at the strange wording that the small being had used. "And what exactly do you mean by saying _my precious_, Frodo Baggins?"

"Well…it-it is generally what people say when they are greatly obsessed with something, and desire it above anything else." Frodo said, looking up at the ceiling briefly with a stiff jaw, as if saying this was not coming easy at all. "And that is an ill thing indeed for the burden I carry…for if I were to claim it as my own…"

The priest remained silent, listening carefully for the hobbit to continue, but there was silence for several seconds.

"…I think I would start to get a rather serious throat condition and start to look like a deformed frog of sorts."

Both of the priest's eyebrows went up. "A deformed _frog_? My child, what do you speak of? Do you perhaps think that God will curse you because of your desire for this thing?"

"Well…no…but the thing I _want _will curse me."

"How so?"

"I would demonstrate, but that would mean the end of the world."

"Oh. Most unusual…"

"It is, Father."

"It sounds rather dangerous."

"Well, it is that as well. Actually, it is even a danger for me to be here. For I have been pursued for nearly a year now…"

"By what?"

At that moment, a sudden, piercing shriek cut through the still air of the church, and a cold wind blowing in through the open windows near the front doors caused the light, white curtains to flap wildly in the room and blow out many candles on the altar…and within the second of that screech, the small room was brought into darkness that the priest had not seen in the place for a great while during his ministry.

And to make matters worse, Frodo now seemed more frightened than a rabbit cornered by a fox, clutching something wildly in his hand and darting his eyes here and there about the room as if searching for an attacker of some kind. "_Them…_" He spoke softly. "_They have found me…I knew they had followed me here!_"

"Er…who?" The priest asked, now sounding a bit nervous as well as the cold wind continued to blow in eerily through the window and chill everything and everyone it touched.

"_Them…_" Frodo whispered, before opening his hand silently and gazing down at something round and shiny in the palm of his hand. "_They have come for me…and for THIS!_" He said, thrusting his hand toward the small window where the priest's face was…finally displaying the One Ring for the old man to see. "_Do you see now why I desire it so!_"

The priest stared at the Ring quietly for a few moments, not quite certain what a thing as small and trivial as a piece of jewelry could do to cause such desire in a hobbit, much less anyone else. "Frodo…tell me…how great of a desire to have this ring is upon you and the others of your kind?"

"Great enough that it has resulted in killing one of my companions." Frodo responded, catching his breath just slightly before placing the Ring carefully back in his pocket. "But you needn't worry. I am safe in here. Creatures of such darkness cannot enter a place of sanctuary."

"…yes…quite a relieving knowledge…" The priest replied, still sounding a bit edgy as he sat back in his seat and tried to allow his heartrate to go back to normal. "So then…as for what you should do with this…desire of yours, my child…I would suggest giving it to the Lord, and praying for guidance and strength. God will see you through this…even if it takes a few things to happen first to let us see it."

Frodo nodded quietly, standing up from the stool then and giving the priest one nod of gratitude before looking up at the golden crucifix hanging up near the wall, crossing himself, and then turning to go up the stairs to the Prayer Tower to do as he was told.

Leaving the priest alone to go and close the windows that were still allowing a faint, chilly breeze in to taunt the room.

All righty! Can't believe there's another chapter up here! Super thanks to all you reviewers! Without you guys, none of this would've been possible…and a special thanks to Lina-Baggins for the suggestion!

And who knows? If you guys liked this one there just might be room for another chapter down the road here…

Review Responses

Lina-Baggins: Awww, you're so sweet! And my first reviewer no less! huggles Thank you so much for the review…and look! Your idea is up on screen! high fives 

Kabuki733701: Thanks for your comment! And yes, the material in this story is indeed rather intense, as I put a warning for up at the top of the page. I'm sorry if you didn't like it, but that is also why this is a K+ rated story, and not K. That warning was for disturbing material, talk of harm (as you could see), and some slightly scary thoughts. Hehe. What do you expect when you're reading a story about the confessions of some of Tolkien's characters! Eeek! Anyway, enough jabbering. Thanks again for the review!

Anawey: laughs You are definitely right! It is very scary. Confessions, ya know? I'm glad you thought it was good though. It's just a little dabbling I did on a boring day, and I expected that some people would think it's a pretty freaky piece of fiction. :) Thanks so much for taking the time to review though! And don't be afraid to laugh! I do it all the time! Mwahahahahahha! Hope you liked the new chappie! (although it is definitely a bit scarier than the other one, eh? But you gotta admit, Frodo's got some pretty creepy enemies chasin' him around…)


	3. Friendship Confession

**Warnings: **Slightly disturbing material, freaky themes, yadda yadda yadda. Plus a little risk of fangirl flames. Hehe. Yes, the threats begin…

**Disclaimer: **Same as the one in the previous chapter…except you might want to change the character. :)

**A/N: **THANKS FOR THE REVIEWS!

Friendship Confessions 

"Have a seat."

A look of guilt. Uncertainty. Nervousness.

Once again the small stool creaked slightly as a figure sat down upon it, but it did not creak nearly as much as the poor thing had expected, and found itself relaxing under the weight it bore. At last.

The priest once again sat down in his own seat behind the small, decorated window, taking a moment to look over the newest comer to the church as if to make sure he wasn't an assassin or devil of sorts, smoothing his robes slowly with his wrinkled hands before finally relaxing and turning his eyes toward the wall of the tiny room instead, so as not to further confuse himself with the appearance of the one outside. "Begin." He said softly a moment later, folding his hands and waiting for a response.

It came in all good time. "Bless me Father, for I have sinned." The elf spoke quietly, his eyes on the ground as he too folded his hands and began to speak. "I bring my sins of disobedience to my father before the Lord."

The priest closed his eyes and nodded softly. This was nothing he hadn't heard before. Far too many times young ones would wander in confessing that they had defied or disobeyed their parents, and this one would (hopefully) be no different. Although he had never had someone that looked like this elf come in and confess this… "Mm. A very easy slip to make, my child." He murmured to the nervous figure outside the window. "Tell me what has caused this defiance."

"Well…it is a very old rule that my father had set up for me since I was a small child." The elf replied in the same quiet tone as ever. "A rule about those I befriend…how I must not befriend mortals of any kind…and I must not even come _near _the Naugrim…I fear I have broken that rule on a handful of occasions."

"I see." The priest responded with a small nod of understanding. "And how have you broken these rules, my child?"

The blonde-haired elf fidgeted uncomfortably on the stool, uneasy blue eyes sweeping the church room as if to make sure no one was listening to their conversation before he spoke again, this time so softly that the slightly seenile priest had to strain his ears to hear him. "There are…two mortals that I have called mellyn nin." He confessed quietly. "A mortal man, Aragorn son of Arathorn, and…" His voice faltered then, and he glanced toward the priest as if asking if it were all right to continue.

The priest nodded slowly, clearly uncertain why this elf was hesitating now in his speech. "Go on."

The elf moved his head away again, looking back down toward the ground. "…and a dwarf. Gimli son of Gloin." He finished, his voice barely above a mouse's whisper as his eyes once again flicked around the room. "Both of them I consider my truest and most beloved friends…this is the truth."

The priest was silent for a moment, considering the problem silently for a moment with a usual sense of calm about him, still faintly relieved that this case was something he felt he had heard before. Of course he had never dealt with a rule like this before…truthfully, he didn't understand most of it. "Well, it is indeed a serious thing to defy your parents, Legolas." He said in a grave and yet serene tone that he had perfected over the years. "Especially concerning things that have to do with choosing your friends."

"But they are not anything dangerous!" Legolas protested, suddenly sounding a bit desperate as if he had said this to many people before the old priest. "They have not hurt me, nor have they denied me in any circumstances! They have remained true and loyal, even putting their lives at risk for mine! How could I ask for friends of more worth than that?"

The priest nodded softly again. "That may be so, but if your father had this rule set up _before _you met these two…mortals…then it is still a matter of disobedience that you came so close to Aragone and Ginlee."

"Aragorn and Gimli." Legolas corrected, his voice once again dropped to a shameful quiet.

"Aragorn and Gimli." The priest repeated with a confirming nod. "And what do you believe your father would say if he learned of this, my child?"

Legolas closed his eyes tightly, as if suddenly picturing a gruesome mental image within his mind's eye. "He would forbid me to see them ever again." He responded in a quick but very quiet voice. "He would be furious…after being so adament about the following of that rule…"

"Mmm…" The priest murmured, still listening and now sounding a bit more concerned as it almost sounded to him that the father of this elf may be a bit over-protective and quick-to-temper. Not a very good thing in these circumstances, he knew well. "And what would your mother say?"

The blue eyes fell once more. "My mother has been gone since I was but a small child." Legolas murmured, his voice now so quiet that the priest only caught the words "mother" "gone" "small child". But those words were enough to clarify the story for him nonetheless. "I do not know what she would say."

The priest nodded very somberly at these words, a new dawning of understanding coming over him. So Legolas' father was an only parent. All the more reason to knock down that temper level a few notches, in his opinion… "Ah…I see." He said in an understanding and gentle voice that he often used in the midst of sympathy. "Well, in that case, what do you believe you should do in this situation?"

"Well, I don't really know…" Legolas responded, sounding nervous once again. "I was rather hoping you could tell me…or perhaps give me a bit of advice?" He looked hopefully over at the window, the look on his face pleading for help as the priest had seen one-too-many times during his line of work.

"Well, in a case like this, your answer is very simple." The priest replied, slipping back into his usual tutorial-sounding voice, faintly relieved that now was the time for the answer to the problem. "Take your troubles to the Lord, pray for guidance, and answer to His will in the fifth commandment. This will give you strength to do what you must do, and that is to tell your father what you have done, and accept his answer to the breach of his rule. The Lord will watch over you no matter what happens."

Legolas listened quietly (as usual) while he spoke, his hands still nervously entwining with one another, but when the priest finished speaking he gave a nod of acknowledgement, and stood silently from the stool to give the room one last glance, crossing himself reverantly when his eyes fell upon the golden crucifix on the wall, and then turning to walk slowly and strangely noiselessly from the room.

Leaving the priest alone to shake his head silently as the strange golden-haired being left his sight.

---))---

And there is chapter 3! Thank you all so much for your patience, but I did indeed go on vacation this month (what's new?), and I am SO grateful for the reviews you left me. This chappie once again owes a thank you to Lina-Baggins for her suggestion of doing one with Legolas, but still a big thank-you to everyone else who has cared to read this story over!

Review Responses 

Anawey: Ah, why try not to laugh? Hehe! I know! It's very scary. Confessions always are. Believe me, my grandfather would know! Thanks for reading and THANK YOU for reviewing:)

Kabuki733701: Gollum! Hahahaha! Yeah, you're not kidding that guy would have a lot to confess! He'd probably scare the poor priest out of his mind! But then again, Gollum doesn't seem like the kind of creepy-crawly that would confess all his sins… but then again, you never know. (evil grin) May have to take that into consideration…thanks for droppin' another review!

Lina-Baggins: My hero! Hehe! Thanks so much for dropping another great review Miss Baggins! And you were totally right about Legolas. That guy does have a thing or two to confess now, doesn't he? Thanks for the idea once again, and if I rock…well, you rock WAY MORE! (hugs) Thanx for reading my story! Chapter 3 is up!


	4. Murder Confession

**Warnings: **As usual, slightly disturbing material, a possibility of a few people not liking what's going on here, and the warning of a very intense chapter. (gulp) So in other words, be prepared!

**Disclaimer: **Same as the one in the previous chapter, except, once again, you might want to change the character. :)

**A/N: **I owe a billion thanks to my reviewers, so I shall GIVE you a billion thanks! Thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou…etc.

Murder Confession 

"Have a seat."

A look of guilt. Uncertainty. Nervousness.

The poor stool creaked yet again as something else sat down upon it…although the little wooden thing realized with slight confusion that the figure on top of it was not exactly sitting in the same way that the other ones had. It was sitting…well, kind of like a frog or something…

The priest sat down in his own chair behind the door, smoothing his robes and folding his hands dutifully as he prepared for another confession (he was quite used to this now, of course), clearing his mind as he always did beforehand, and then turned his head to look out the small, decorated window and see whom was confessing this time.

And what he saw made every single remaining white hair on his head stand up on end.

Sitting outside was…well, what many of the children from Sunday School would probably call an "alien". But to him, well, all he could say was that this new creature was definitely not human. It had grayish-blue skin, huge eyes, hardly any hair on its head, ugly features through-and-through…and if this was a prank being played, well, the priest was officially not liking it.

But then again, this thing at least looked sincere enough to want to confess something, so the poor old man quickly gathered himself together as best he could, and in the calmest voice he could muster, he spoke in a surprisingly controlled tone: "Begin."

"Blessses usss Father, for we have sinned…" The strange form spoke in a hissy, almost strangled voice that made the priest jump just slightly in his seat. "We bringsss the sinses of murder before the Shiny One…"

One of the white eyebrows on the priest's face went up at that revelation, not exactly pleased to hear that this strange creature was talking about such a thing as murder, as normally in his country, anyone who committed murder deserved to die – but then again, perhaps that law only applied to humans… "Murder?" He finally asked after a moment, bringing himself together yet again. "Are you saying you have…_killed _someone, my child?"

"We isss not Holy Man'sss childses!"

"Very well, then. Now, have you killed anyone?"

"…not yet."

Now faintly relieved, the priest reclined in his seat just slightly, but continued to look out the window into the very large orbish eyes outside. "And what brings this desire to do away with a life to your heart, Smeagol?" He asked with a much more definate tone to his voice now. "Is it anger? Jealousy?"

"Both." Smeagol responded in the same croaky, hissy voice as before, except now with more guilt in his tone than ever. He shifted slightly on the stool he was perched upon, glancing around the church nervously as he continued to speak. "M-Massster has been tricksssy…but we doesssn't want to kill him!"

"You don't?" The priest asked, now slightly confused. "Well then, why will you do such a terrible thing if you do not want to do it?"

At this, Smeagol's eyes turned fearful, and his hands gripped the edge of the stool with a great deal more force than before. "B-because…_he _wantsss Smeagol to do it…" He said in a slightly hollow tone. "He…_tellsss _Smeagol to do it…"

"Who tells you this?" The priest asked. "Your master?"

"No, no, musssn't speak his nameses, precious!" Smeagol immediately said, looking very disturbed as his huge eyes flitted briefly to the window. "H-he tellsss Smeagol not to come here…not to speak to Holy Man! He tellsss Smeagol to take Massster to Her! But we doessn't want to do it, precious!"

'_Precious_?' The priest thought, not understanding why in the world this word was being used the way it was, but now suspecting that if these creature wasn't human, it definitely had some mental issues. "Then why don't you just tell…_him_…that you will not do it?"

"He will make Smeagol do it anywayses!" Smeagol said, turning his gigantic eyes back on the priest with desperation now lingering in them. "_He _is very tricksssy! Musn't know Smeagol came here! Musn't ever know!"

The priest was silent for a few moments. He honestly could not say anything. To be truthful, he was rather considering calling the police at the moment, but he decided to wait until he was very certain that he could not help this poor creature…although he knew the chances of that were very slim, judging from the way he was talking. He would definitely pray for this one later… "Then do not tell him, my child. Tell your Master about what _he _says, so he may be prepared as well. Take any measures you wish, but be sure to take your troubles and fears to the Lord as well. He will see you through this, and be sure to pray for wisdom and discernment. Both you will need for this, so go now and talk to him."

Smeagol watched him silently as he spoke, his face now looking utterly hopeless before he heaved a long, almost insect-like sigh, and began to get up off the stool while the priest sat back once again, and finally let himself relax after that slightly odd conversation…

And in the end, his relaxation did not last very long, as suddenly and completely without warning, a sickening, furious shriek came from the figure on the stool, and he suddenly found himself nose-to-nose with a newly-faced Smeagol that had now pressed his face against the window and right at the priests. "NASSTTY HOLY MAN! DESSSTROYING USSS PRECIOUS! TALKING TO SMEAAAAGOOL PRECIOUS! _KILL HIM! KILL HIM!_" And with these wild words, the priest received the shock of his life when the creature suddenly reached forward, taking hold of the wooden designs on the window and starting to rip them off with such force that they splintered all over the place. "_KILL HIM!_"

"AAAHHH!" The priest yelled, now officially certain that his life was in mortal danger as he leapt off of his seat and made a run for the exit of the small room as quickly as he could, turning the door handle with a violently trembling hand and ripping it open…only to see with mounting horror the same creature coming scrambling across the floor outside right toward him, still shrieking the horrific words that it had been before. "Oh, Lord JESUS PRESERVE ME!" Slamming the door closed and bolting it with whatever he could find – his chair, candle extinquishers, curtain rods, whatever he could get ahold of. "Be gone, evil spirit!"

"_WE ISSS NOT EVIL SPIRITSESS!" _The maddened creature outside screeched, pounding on the door with such a force that the curtain rod was already bending. "_MUSST KILL HOLY MAN! CANNOT WARN TRICKSSSY HOBBITSESS!_ _KILL HIM!_"

"NOO!" The priest wailed, looking around desperately for another exit of any kind, crossing himself over and over again as he did so…but after a few moments of doing this and not finding any escape whatsoever, he did the next most reasonable thing for a man of his age to do…

And fell right over in a dead faint.

--))--

All right, there's chapter 4! See why I stuck that warning up there in the beginning? (nervous chuckle) That poor priest…I'm not being very nice to him, am I? But thanks SO much to Kabuki733701 for the idea of Smeagol/Gollum! As you can see I wasn't kidding when I said that that particular creature wouldn't bode well for our priestly friend, but it was a great idea nonetheless!

_Review Responses_

Lina-Baggins: Yes, my friend, you may indeed be crowned queen of plot bunnies! I'm sorry I couldn't use one of your plotbunnies this time, but Gollum just had to be done! Pretty good idea actually, if you think about it…but I am definitely taking yours into consideration. See if I can't get another chappie up here at one time or another…my schedule has been so odd lately though, it's hard to tell when update times will be. So just bare with me, mellon nin! (hugs) Thanks for reviewing!

**Kabuki733701: Ahh, and here is the triumphant one! (applauds wildly along with the crowd behind her) Thank you SOOO much for the idea Kab! And guess what? It's up on screen! Gollum was actually a pretty fun idea…not that it did very well for our priest, as I'm guessing he'll have to spend a few weeks in the hospital before he's ready to do any more listening…but I'll try to break him out before then, if possible. :) Thanks again, and thank you for reviewing!**


	5. Humiliation Confession

**Warnings: **Slightly disturbing material, evil talk, risk of chewed fingernails…(man, I thought I busted that habit a while ago…) you get the picture. :)

**Disclaimer: **Same as the other chapter, but again, make sure you change the charry!

**A/N: **All hail reviewers! Yahoo! (solutes them) You guys save my life…

Humiliation Confession 

"Have a seat."

The stool did not creak.

The priest behind the decorated wooden window had not even looked out at who was there yet. He was currently wearing a neckbrace, and a look of great unease plagued his aged face as he quickly but nervously straightened his robes once he sat down, and tried to gather himself before risking a look outside.

The only thing he could think to pray for now, was that it would not be the same kind of creature that had put him in the hospital for nearly two weeks after their…discussion. That creature had obviously been possessed, and the priest could not recall ever being trained in the area of casting out demons. Especially one that talked like _that_, and seemed to have more than one of itself.

But this was beside the point now, and the priest finally took a deep breath…and turned to look out the window.

And upon one glance, he felt himself freeze and go absolutely rigid in terror.

The figure sitting on the stool outside was robed all in black, with a sickly-looking mask/helmet on his head, no visible face behind it…his hands metallic and sharp, soft, hissy breath coming in and out of the fathomless hole where his head should have been…

If the priest had been any more immature, he would have sworn upon first glance that he was gazing upon death itself…or at least the grim reaper. But this felt very real…very real indeed…almost like the room had suddenly grown chill with the pure realization of an evil presence in the room…

That did it. Standing up with surprising speed for a man that age, the priest got up from his seat and made straight for the door of the tiny room to go and call the police or _anyone _who might spare him from another heart attack…but he suddenly found himself stopping as soon as he heard a hissy, sickening, cavern-deep voice behind him coming from the figure sitting weightlessly on the stool.

"_Stay…_"

And for some unknown and very horrifying reason, the priest found himself doing just that. Walking back over to his seat as stiff as a board and sitting down with a small creak of his back and the small groan of his chair. And turning giant, aged eyes on the small window again, the priest found himself facing the creature of darkness again, and even speaking afterward. "Begin."

"_Bless me, Father, for I have sinned…_" The hollow, piercing voice spoke afterward, nothing readable about the dark figure at all, but the priest could have sworn he sounded slightly worn and weary. "_I bring the sin of temptation before the Other Lord._"

Now this made the priest raise an eyebrow. Either this one really was a demon, or he was some terribly mislead spirit of sorts. To describe God as the _Other Lord_… "And…um… what temptation do you bring before the Lord…my child?" The poor old man asked unsteadily, his hands already quivering as he knew he feared the answer he would receive.

"_The temptation of revenge…_" The cruel voice mumbled in response. "_I wish to kill a warrior maiden from Rohan, and a warrior hobbit from the Shire. Both red-heads._"

The priest's eyes went blank. "Are you telling me you wish to murder someone as well, my child?"

"_Do not call me that. And yes, I do want to murder someone. Now stop asking questions and let me keep talking_."

The priest's eyes remained completely blank. "Fine. Go on."

"_Now, this warrior maiden and warrior hobbit actually…did away with me in the War of the Ring, or so they called it, but the maiden clearly had an unfair advantage, as women are not supposed to be **allowed** in battle!_"

"All right…keep going…"

"_So I was destroyed then, utterly humiliated and sent to the bowels of…well, I don't exactly remember…but I am here now to confess that I wish to return them the favor and kill them both._"

"And you believe this will help your humiliation to be…smoothed over?"

"_Perhaps_."

"Somehow I doubt it will. Whether you kill them or not…well, were there any witnesses to your death?"

"_Of course_."

"Then I am afraid it will not be easy avoiding the humiliation that will come from this. However, if you were to _speak _with either of them…"

"_Oh yes…of course…Black Breath! Now why didn't I think of that? Hm…clearly my lack of a body is beginning to catch up with me…Black Breath will most certainly do the trick. That will teach them a lesson!_"

"…um…what is Black Breath, my child?" The priest asked nervously, not liking the sound of that name at all…

"_Nothing you would know about…unless of course…_" The cloaked figure turned its empty, helmeted head _slowly _in the priest's direction. "…_you would care for an example..?_"

"Um-uh-um, no thank you…" The priest said quickly, his old heart already starting to thump wildly on him as his old bought of fear suddenly and immediately caught up with him, causing him to leap up from his chair once more, and start backing away swiftly toward the door. "I-I think you had better just go on now…a-and be sure to pray in the tower before you carry out this terrible deed!"

"_I will. But I may be back…just to warn you…_" The dark thing replied, standing to its feet as silently as a shadow from the stool, and turning slowly _without _crossing himself toward the tower of the church.

And this was the priest's signal to dive out of the room as quickly as dared without giving himself a heart attack, making straight for his chambers at a surprisingly fast pace for a man of his age.

There was no question about it now. This had been the final straw.

He was going to retire.

--))--

**Well, NOW look what you guys have done! (sulks) I go and break him out of the hospital so he can be in the next chapter, and now you've made him RETIRE! What am I going to do NOW! (looks over story hopelessly) I can't very well continue this story without a priest…and if I get a new one, it just won't have the same affect! (drops story to side) Oh well. We might just have to wait and see. But in the meantime…**

Review Responses 

**Kabuki733701: IT'S SO GOOD TO SEE YOU AGAIN! Awww, I'm so glad you liked the other chapter! (blushes) But look what's happened now! The priest is LEAVING! Oh what to do! (rubs hand down face) I still don't know if I can convince him to come back…it might take a little talking to…so you'll have to be very patient and bare with me! (cringes) I can't stand OC's. Especially old ones. They're so…touchy. (shakes head) Ah well. Thanks for reviewing, and hopefully I'll see you later!**

**Lina-Baggins: Mellon nin! Thank you so much for reviewing! I am so sorry to have kept you waiting like that…but hopefully you're still checking back to see if I've updated…because I FINALLY got the next chapter up! And thank you very much for your compliments as well. They really keep me going. You and Kab rock! high fives and high fives But on that note…bad news about the priest isn't it? shakes head Yeah, I'm going to have to try and talk to him. If you have any ideas…feel free to express them…**


	6. Retirement

**Warnings: **Retired priesties going off to the country side, a risk of nervous twitching here and there, and the usual. :)

**Disclaimer: **Think you guys can remember it? (hint hint)

**A/N: **THANK YOU TO ALL MY REVIEWERS! I bow to thee…I-I worship thee! I can't even begin to say how thankful I am to you guys for hanging in there with me. And what do you know? I was able to come up with another chapter! Yehaw!

Retirement 

It had been a long time in the history of St. Matthew's church since a priest had last retired upon matters that were simply out of fear. In fact, if truth were to be told…some had to agree that it had never happened before…and Priest Herman was leaving. Many were sorry to see him go…others really couldn't remember whether they had ever seen him before or not. After all, he did most of the Confessions, so his face was always hidden behind that little decorated window.

But in any case, Priest Herman asked to leave without any fuss from the congregation (after all, who KNEW what could be lurking in the crowds after what he had witnessed in the past week or so…?), and simply packed his bags and struck out onto the streets on a cold Saturday night…heading straight for a small inn outside of town that he was very certain he would be safe in. Very few knew where it was, and he had always liked a sort of cozy life himself.

With him, he took a few changes of clothing, some ancient candles, a few old books, and a large crucifix that he was counting on to save him from whatever evil may have tried to follow him on his long walk through the deserted streets of the city, and on the road to that little inn at the least-suspicious speed that he could manage. At least he was free now. Free from that awful job that had nearly given him a one-way ticket to his grave due to the severity of the "confessions" he had been dealing with. That was just _wrong_. And he had no idea just how far God's mercy stretched – though he suspected it was pretty far – but no matter how far it went, at least it wasn't any of _his _business.

The people at the inn were, of course, courteous and kind to the old man, giving him a nice snug room on the top floor, and offering him anything that he might have needed and being sure he was comfortable before they went on to anything else for themselves. The priest blessed them for this, and settled down in his new, cozy room to pass away the rest of the hours of the night with a good book and the heater turned high enough to make him feel very snug indeed. Yes, this was very good. Very good indeed. It even beat the hospital, he had to admit. Perhaps he would even stay here for a few days.

And when Priest Herman did indeed fall asleep that night, book in his lap, he was immediately filled with very pleasant and relieving dreams…and this would be about the point when we would draw out and leave him where he is right here and now so that this story will actually be able to turn into a "Happily Ever After"…even for an old man.

But unfortunately, the fates are not so generous…and in the wee hours of the morning that night, just as the heater was dying down slightly and the light from the sacred candles was burning low…a sudden, chilly gust of wind blew against the room's little window, ruffling the curtains with a forboding swishing sound, and completely snuffing out any remaining candles that may still have been surviving in the area.

And when the room was completely let go of all extra light other than the moonlight coming in through the window, and the priest was still snoring softly in his chair with no idea whatsoever of what was happening…a dark figure slipped quietly in through the open window, not making a sound as he hit the floor below him like a cat, slowly making his way toward the chair in which the old man was sleeping like a forboding shadow come to life from the priest's worst fears.

The crucifix was ignored, although deftly respected by the figure swiftly swiping his hand across his forehead in a sign of reverance just as he reached the priest's chair, leaned down close to the old man's ear…and whispered into it in a voice that was low but smoothe…and very unmistakable.

"_Wake up, Father…_"

It did not take long for the old man to respond to that. And what a very nice response it was. His eyes flew open in a shot, and all the color left his face in a time that would have gone down in the records had anyone else been there to see it…and anyone else who wouldn't have been phased by the look of the figure next to the priest, who was now looking on calmly as the poor fellow leapt to his feet with a yell and scrambled backwards several feet, siezing up a fire poker that was sitting up innocently against the wall, and finally holding it out feebly at the figure before him.

"Who are you!" He demanded frantically, sweat beading on his forehead when the figure gave a small sigh from under the hood that he wore as though to shield his eyes from being able to be seen. "What do you want! Why have you followed me! Don't you know I am the Lord's servant! Be gone!"

"Be gone?" The figure asked, a light chuckle shaking his shoulders as he reached up his hands to finally draw back the cloth that covered his face. "Well, my dear man, I can avoid being seen if I wish…but to disappear entirely, that is a rare gift." He said, and when the hood fell away, the priest could now see the face of a rugged-looking man with a dark beard and a knowing smile on his face. But the strangest thing to the priest was, infact, that he had never seen this man before.

"Who are you?" The old man asked suspiciously, his hands trembling as he held onto the poker for dear life.

The man's smile turned wry. "Are you frightened?"

The priest hesitated, his immediate thought to lie and declare boldly that he was not afraid of a mere stranger, especially with the Lord on his side…but that would be lying, and heaven knew that a man of his service could not tell a lie, so instead he told the truth. "Yes." His voice came out sounding rather small, but at least it came out.

"Not nearly frightened enough." The stranger said, his voice sincere as he stole a glance out the window before turning his eyes back to where the priest stood. "I know what haunts you."

"Haunts me?" The priest breathed, his legs now shaking as well from underneath his casual but distinguishing robes. "I-I do not know what you…"

"Yes you do." The stranger replied simply. "I know what has visited you, and I know why you seek to hide here even when you had the greatest sanctuary from evil where you were in that church." He stole another glance out the window. "My name is Aragorn. I have come to bring you back."

"Well, I am afraid I am retired, or haven't you heard?" Priest Herman said, a bit of edge to his voice as he pointed the poker a little bit farther out. "I am no longer in for confessions, and I have left the church!"

"And yet you are still a man of God, are you not?" The man, Aragorn, asked.

The priest did not respond. He did not want to. Truthfully, he could not think of anything safe to say that would not give away something about himself that might lead to further disasters. The last thing he needed now was for that _black thing _to come back…

Aragorn nodded. "I thought as much. Then you will not come back to the church?"

The priest shook his head firmly. "I am afraid not." But a man of God he was indeed, and it wasn't long before his conscience began to throb painfully inside of him. How could he refuse the plea of a child of the Lord? He never had before… "…but why is it that you want me to return?"

The stranger's eyes never left his. "There are others that need your guidance. Those that are forever trapped by the snare of evil – "

"I am sorry, I do not do exorcisms." Priest Herman's voice spilled out, but Aragorn held up a hand.

"I was not speaking of demons, Father." The man said. "But there are some that will come to the church in search of sanctuary and relief…and Gandalf the White has forseen a destiny for you that you may not see now, but will be of the greatest value to the lives of you and others."

The priest stared at him in disbelief. "What? Me?" He asked in a very timid voice. "I-I do not…"

"The word of Gandalf has never come to us untruthfully."

"No man is perfect."

"Gandalf is no man."

"I see."

"Will you come back?"

"Mr. Aragorn…I have had experiences that you – "

"I understand your hesitation. I cannot say you have no reason for it."

"Thank you."

"What if I were to tell you that terrible things will come to the church if you do not return?"

"Posh! It is the Lord's House!"

"And yet even a simple stone structure may be destroyed."

"…will it be dangerous?"

"I cannot say."

"That is my point."

"So you will not come back?"

"No."

"Very well then."

And before the priest could say another word, the next thing he knew, he was standing in an empty room with cold wind brushing in through an open window, fire poker still held in his hand, and a look of horror still permanantly etched on his aged face.

Aragorn was gone.

But somehow Priest Herman wasn't feeling very safe anymore.

--))--

**Well, well, well! There is my attempt at trying to bring him back! So retirement doesn't seem to have helped dear Priest Herman very much, has it? The poor guy. Can't even escape to the countryside. But I wonder what will happen now? He refused Aragorn, but he doesn't feel very good about it. Oh, what is to become of him? (dramatic swoon) He doesn't like me very much for continuing to stalk him down either. But if he must go…I won't let him go without a fight! (charges forward valiantly) Guwahahaha!**

**-Review Responses-**

**Deana: Oh thank you, thank you very, very much! You are much too kind. I am very glad you like this story! Hopefully there won't be anymore huge update gaps from this point on, so you guys can continue to enjoy it in peace. :) Thank you for your reviews! I really appreciate them! (hugs)**

**Kabuki733701: Ah, mellon nin! It doth me good to see your reviews again! (hugs) I'm very glad you liked the new chapter! But you're right. Taking the next step from the last chapter was indeed hard…but as you can see, I'm not letting this guy go! Not without a decent run-down first. He's way too good a guy to just be left out of all the excitement like that. The only difficult thing now will be to try and get him to actually help out a little bit, you know? He's an old guy, but he's a _good _guy…oh, and by the way, I have all of your suggestions stored away just in case of more confessions…just so you know. ;)**

**Lindahoyland: Oh, well thank you! You speak of two valid points for me there. Thank you very much for complimenting my writing, and I do agree with you about the "unusual" part. It is very unusual. And I'm rather proud of it, to be quite honest. :)**


	7. Guilt Confession

**Warnings: **Wha--? A CONFESSION! (gasps loudly) Everyone run! Everyone hide! (runs away wailing)

**Disclaimer: **The usual drill. Ya guys all march by it. :)

**A/N: **Yaaayyy! Another moment for me to thank my beloved reviewers! You guys keep this whole thing going. And look what we have here! Yet another chapter! Mwahahaha! Oh, and another thanks to everyone who gave me the note about the "Priest" to "Father" thing with the name…as actually, I spent a GREAT deal of time with my sister thinking about which one to put up there…and in the end when Chel (my sister) looked it over, she insisted on the "Priest" thing (because she said that the name would be a key point later in the story, but I didn't see why). Oh well. It's all fixed now. THANKS GUYS:D

Guilt Confession 

"Have a seat."

A look of guilt. Uncertainty. Nervousness.

The newly-built and sturdy stool made not a sound as the new confessor came to sit down carefully upon it, as though proud to demonstrate that it was perfectly capable of holding up anything – even a man of considerable age, such as the one that was now sitting down to look over with a small gulp at the small, decorated window by his head.

On the other side, he could see a priest. A priest dressed in scarlett robes with white ties at the chest and the waist, a head of grey hair with a big bald spot right on top, and an expression of the utmost calm and confidence on his face. It made the man's guilt increase slightly, but he didn't stop to try and explain to himself why he felt that way. He merely waited for the other to speak first, as it had been a very long time since he had done this.

"Begin." The cue was given a moment later, and the man knew his time had come. It wouldn't be so bad…after all, all he had to do was change his voice a little bit and just say what he had to say…and then it would all be over.

Right?

"Bless me Father, for I have sinned." He mumbled, surprised at how awkward the words felt in his mouth. "I…I bring guilt before the Lord…"

"Guilt?" The priest on the other side repeated, though there was no sound of movement from the other side of the decorated window. It made the man nervous. "And where does this guilt come from, my child?"

The man nearly rolled his eyes, but he knew that that would do him no good. To be immature here would not help him get through this any quicker. So instead, he chose to force himself to speak again. "There was a man that came to me the night before last." He let the words spill out, just as he had planned to do. "He asked for my help…but I refused him. I believed that he asked too much of me."

"Ah." The priest on the other side was nodding, the man could sense that. "Well, such a thing is not uncommon. What was he asking of you?"

The man almost winced. He had been afraid that he would have to answer that question, but now that it was being asked…well, he knew he had no choice. Of course he could lie…but he would never do that. Not with the oaths he had taken at the beginning of his former career. "I am a retired man." He finally forced out, glad that his voice sounded as steady as it did. "He wanted me to return to my job…claiming that I was needed, and that I had some sort of…destiny in front of me…" He shook his head. "But I do not wish to return to my job. It was cursed. Father, you would not believe the things I witnessed there…"

"Were they things of evil?" The priest asked smoothely.

"Yes." The man had to restrain himself greatly to keep from shouting out his answer. "There were wicked things…demons, I am sure. I could not remain in a place where so much evil was allowed to fester…so I left."

"Mm." The priest murmured, still not moving from where he sat behind the window. "And did this man give you any other reason for why you should go back?"

"Well…not really…"

"Did he sound like he was a fortune teller, or someone who is not to be trusted?"

"He sounded…suspicious. Almost as if he were bordering on the brink of sounding dangerous, but he always skirted it with a tone of calm…I don't know how else to explain it."

"Hmm…and do you believe his request was sincere?"

"I…I was too overwhelmed at the time to judge that. He sounded too much like…the _others_."

"The others?"

"The other ones that came to confess to me before I retired. They talked much like he did…like they came from a time that was many, many years ago…almost from another world all together. I can't truthfully place why I thought that. Perhaps I am just getting old…"

"I doubt that. You are not the first to come to me with tellings of strange things such as these."

At this, the old man looked up in surprise. "Really?" He asked.

"Yes." The priest continued, still as calmly as ever. "Peddlers, travellers, and other townspeople have come up to me saying that people much as you have described have come up to them, asking them strange questions, mostly in the form of asking for directions. And although you are the first man of God to come to me…I must tell you that many of the questions that were asked of these people had to do with asking where a certain…church was."

Once again, every little hair on the man's neck stood up on end. "Wh…what?" He stammered, suddenly feeling as though he had been stampeded with a canyon-load of disturbing information. "But…wait…did they…were they…and _how _did you know that I am a man of God?"

"You wear the crucifix of the priests." The priest responded calmly from the other side of the wall, though he did not move to look to check and see if he was right. "It is not that hard to guess. And I would also guess that it was you that all these strange people went to once they found their church."

Father Herman opened his mouth to reply, but no sound came out for a few seconds. "I… they…I thought they…" He shook his head sharply as he caught himself slurring his words again, and took just the briefest moment to regain control on his mouth, at least. "I do not know what to do. Are you saying that you believe I was…meant to help these people?"

"Perhaps." The priest responded evenly. "But then, perhaps they are up to no good at the same time. It will be up to you to judge, my child, though I would not do it without the Lord's help. Pray to Him, and ask Him for the guidance you will need to make your decision. Only He is able to give you the true help you need."

Father Herman swallowed, afterward taking in a deep breath and becoming very uncomfortable as his heart rate sped up to a rather disturbing rate. He was simply too old to be dealing with this. When he had taken this Oaths, he had had _no _idea that this would be part of his test of faith. Never.

Good lord, what was to become of him!

But he knew this was not a question to ask the priest, so instead he murmured a thank-you to the other old man, stood up, crossed himself, and turned to leave the very old building that the St. Joseph's church had become.

One thing was for sure now, at least.

He was going to pray…and then he was going to have to find a way to contact that strange man again. There was no other way to go around it.

Heavens…if he ever needed God's help before, that was nothing compared to now.

He was most sincerely doomed.

--))--

**(gasp) Oh my goodness! So Father Hermanhas gone in for a _Confession! _Yikes! The madness continues! But at least he's one step closer to dealing with this though. I guess Aragorn's visit disturbed him a little bit more than he would have let on to anyone else, didn't it? Oh well. Let's hope I'll be able to catch another chapter with him soon. He's getting a bit harder to track down these days…**

**-Review Responses-**

**Kabuki733701: Oh, mellon nin! (hugs tightly) Thank you for the compliments! It gives me a lot more energy to write when I know you guys like the story so much. You're so sweet! Oh…and look! Another confession! (gasps dramatically) But from the dear Father himself! Hmmm…I guess this does mean this will NOT be the end of confessions…and it's all YOUR fault! ;) (giggles and high-fives Kabby) Thanks for droppin' another review my way. I sure do appreciate it! **

**Lina-Baggins: Oh, don't worry about the late review, my dear friend! (hugs) Thank you for leaving one for me, as I KNOW what it is like to have computer problems. (gives a hacking cough toward the huge gap in her updates) And yes, poor Father Herman does indeed get the short end of the stick. But let's face it, he's got a tough job:) Thank you so much for your compliments, mellon nin. I love getting your feedback! (goes off to quickly store away the Théoden Idea in her Idea Drawer) I mustn't lose this…**

**Almostinsane: Lol! I love your penname! (cracks up) And don't you worry about the priest. I've got my eye locked on him, and he's not goin' anywhere if I can help it. (dresses up in F.B.I. outfit and takes off to go track down the old man) And as I said in my Author's Note up there, thank you so much for your tip about Father Herman's title! Like I said, my sister and I argued over that for a while, and she insisted that it should be "Priest Herman" because it SOUNDED right, and because she said it would play a part in the rest of the story. I have no idea why…but that's what she said. Anyway, enough blabbing. Thanks for helping me fix it up! (hugs)**

**Lindahoyland: Ha! (laughs) The Nazgul getting the dear priest! I'm not sure that poor guy would live after he already had one heart attack. ;) But you're already getting the plotbunnies stirred up, so you'd better watch what you put in my head…(looks around cautiously)…them Black Riders just might be popping up at any moment…lol! Thanks for your review! **


	8. Thievery Confession

Warnings: Yet another confession. What else can I say? Oh, but I wouldn't get too comfortable yet folks, because, once again, this is no ordinary confession. (evil hint, hint)

**Disclaimer: **(dances the Disclaimer Dance) Lalalala…you get the picture…

**A/N: **THANKS TO ALL MY REVIEWERS! (has Elven army come up behind her and solute all reviewers) You guys are the greatest. Couldn't do withoutcha'!

Thievery Confession 

The next few days for Father Herman were something akin to a nightmare.

He probably prayed more in one night than he had in half of the rest of his life put together, and any attempts he might have made to find the strange man that had come to him a few nights before was completely in vain. No one had heard of anyone named "Aragorn" around town, and everyone he asked began to look at him as though wondering whether he had gone slightly senile.

He never slept well. He hardly ate. Everything was like a panicked frenzy around him…wondering if the strange man would return, or if he should set out to try and find him, or if he should simply return to the church that he had left and hope to smoothe out the situation that way. But who knew what might await him there? He was already so petrified after what he had recently seen that it hardly felt safe to leave his cozy room in the inn, and the idea of reliving those nightmares did not necessarily appeal to him.

Not to mention the fact that the priest at the other church had told him that other people had seen people of the same strangeness that he had seen. That could mean that those…beings could be anywhere. Everywhere. Perhaps right under his bed. There was just no way to be certain of _anything _anymore. To think, at any given time he could just take one peek out his window…and then a hand could appear out of nowhere, grab him, and…

Oh dear.

It was just as he had suspected before. He was doomed.

And yet, for some strange reason, he felt that he could not just brush this away. Not with the plea of a (supposedly) innocent man asking him to come back for religious and destiny reasons, and also the word of a fellow priest who suggested that he should go through with this. And certainly not with his conscience bugging him! That was one of the worst parts about being a man of God, he thought. It is often very hard to do something wrong without having _something _knaw at you from the inside out.

Therefore, he continued to pray, continued to ask around the area whenever he could…and tried to prepare himself for what he knew lay ahead. His return to the church. He even tried comforting himself with the thought that he might only be there for a little while before he was able to leave again, but somehow that didn't work either. Nothing worked.

Well, who ever said he _wasn't _doomed?

God did, of course. But that was really beside the point.

And so it passed into the third or fourth night after his confession. He was beginning to feel the tiniest bit organized knowing what he had tried and what he hadn't, and knowing that God was still listening to every prayer he offered. That was at least a start. And at least with this feeling of organazation there came a slight feeling of ease, so he felt a small bit of hope when he thought of going to sleep that night. Perhaps he would actually be able to sleep now. And how helpful that would be to his thinking processes!

Yes, it had to be done.

So with a huge yawn Father Herman slowly got himself ready for bed, changing into something more comfortable and reading his nightly Bible passage before slipping under the covers that lay spread over a soft mattress that the room provided, and letting out a long sigh of relief when a drastic feeling of weariness overtook him. Yes, he would be able to sleep tonight. And everything would look better in the morning because of it.

Yes indeed.

Zzzzz…

--

Poor Father Herman. If only he knew.

You see, although the occasional sympathy is given to certain characters of certain fanfictions is given from time to time, this certain authoress' sympathy doesn't stretch _too _far, and therefore there was really no chance of the poor old man having a completely undisturbed sleep that night.

For at that very moment, even as he lay snoring on that soft mattress and dreaming about living on a cloud somewhere out in Arizona (old men are _strange_), two shadowed figures were slowly creeping in through his window (he forgot to lock it again), making hardly a sound as they hopped down onto the wooden floor and began to creep toward the bed – for although they were small, they were just the right size for doing some very expertise sneaking.

And it didn't take long for them to reach the bed either. Nor did it take long for the slightly taller one of the two to whisper something to the shorter one, and cause the shorter one to slowly and very carefully creep up alongside the bed and closer to Father Herman's unsuspecting head, still not making a sound, and eyeing the face of the old man as though he would shatter at any moment.

And then, as soon as he had reached the place where he wanted to be, he stood up just slightly on his tip-toes so as better to lean over Father Herman's face…and then whispered to him as softly and clearly as you please. "F-Father Herman? Sir?"

Boom.

It took only another half-a-second for Father Herman's eyes to spring _wide _open…and come to rest upon a round, innocent-looking face that he would have immediately assumed to be a child's face under any other circumstances, but upon a slightly longer glance, he realized that it was actually a rather adultish face he was looking at. But that wasn't the point. The point was that this face was very close to his, in _his _room, and seemed to be speaking to him in a way that demonstrated that this newcomer knew exactly who he was, even though the priest had absolutely no idea who the newcomer was.

Perfect.

"AHHHHH!" The old man wailed, springing up rapidly into a sitting position on the bed and shoving himself back against the headboard, clutching the sheets against himself wildly as if his life depended on it. "WHO ARE YOU! WHAT DO YOU WANT! WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN HERE? AHHHHHHHH!"

The small being nearly leapt back in surprise at the horrified yells coming from the priest, staggering slightly and eyeing the old man with a slightly terrified gaze before the other and taller one of the two came forward, looking a bit more brave as he watched Father Herman press himself against the wood of the headboard and eye the two of them as if they were both miniature werewolves of some kind.

In another few moments of this silent watching though, the taller one did end up saying something.

"Are you dying?"

This, surprisingly enough, stopped Father Herman's shouting in record time, and he was soon reduced to merely panting rapidly and switching his gaze between the pair at regular intervals. This got rid of the noise, but he was still obviously quite disturbed.

This, though, was apparently all the two newcomers needed, and the tall one spoke again shortly thereafter.

"We know this might be a bad time…but would you mind if we cleared our consciences?"

These words almost stopped the panting this time. Truly, this was just about the last thing Father Herman had expected the intruders to say.

"You mean…" He said slowly, his knuckles completely white from clutching the sheets so hard. "…a confession?"

The two small ones nodded.

Father Herman frowned slightly. "At THIS hour of the night?" He suddenly demanded, as though disbelief were suddenly making him very bold. "Are you mad? How dare you disturb me! I'll have you know I am – "

"Oh, we _knoo!_" The smaller one said quickly, his heavy Scottish-like accident making his words sound different than the taller one's. "Thass' why we came here! We knew yu'd haelp uz!"

The priest continued to stare. "I do not know what you mean."

"Are you a priest?" The taller one asked.

Father Herman was almost tempted to say "no" just for his safety's sake, but sudden memories of Aragorn's visit were enough to silence him just in time, and bring out an unsteady "yes" instead.

The small ones smiled. "Then you're just what we need!" The taller one said cheerfully.

"Will ye listen to uz then?" The smaller one asked eagerly.

Father Herman opened his mouth slowly to reply, still uncomfortably shaken after the uncalled-for entrance than the two had made…but if this was really all they wanted, and it almost ensured that they would go away afterward, perhaps it would be worth it to just let it be this time...just let it flow...just avoid trouble...

Yes, that sounded like a good idea to him.

"Very well then." He responded, glad that his voice wasn't shaking so badly anymore. "Have a seat."

The floor boards creaked slightly as the two little ones sat down, their curly-haired heads tilted up slightly to face the old man as he tried his best to compose himself, reaching over to pick up his crucifix necklace that he had taken off for bed (just in case it decided to choke him in the middle of the night) and put it around his neck a moment later. Then, he was ready. And all he could do was pray to God that it would go well. "Begin."

The two intruders looked at each other briefly, and then the tall one spoke first. "Bless us Father, for we have sinned. We bring the sin of thievery before the Lord."

The priest nodded slowly, not necessarily liking the idea that these two were _thieves_, but he decided to count his lucky stars and be grateful that they were not murderers. "And what caused you do this?" He asked, the professional coaxing in his voice returning to once again lace expertly in his words.

"Oh, a vere' great thing indeed!" The smaller one piped up, nodding eagerly as he spoke. "In fact, if we weren' doin' this, everyone would be a lot warse off!"

Again, the priest nodded. Of course, this could very well be the classic belief of any thief. "And why is that?" He pried carefully.

"'Cause it needs to be done!" The taller one added quickly, this time sounding rather eager himself, as though both of them were desperate to find a way to be forgiven out of this one. "We weren't given choices, see…kinda' like we _had _to do it!"

"I see." Father Herman said, this time not nodding. This was sounding rather…_mysterious_, and he had a very bad feeling that these two were somehow releated with that Aragorn fellow. Hopefully this would be over quickly… "And why did it need to be done?"

"Iss' a secret." The smaller one said gravely. "But you'll find out."

This, of course, unnerved Father Herman even more, especially with the sharp look that the taller one gave the smaller at those words. However, he knew he had better just slip easily out of this one all the same, and went on asking questions and trying to keep his hands from shaking. "And…wh-what exactly did you steal, my children?"

"Oh, nothin' yet." The taller one said, a slightly doomed look on his face. "Not exactly, anyway."

The priest's lips pressed together tightly as his nervousness increased. "Then what _are _you going to steal, my children?" He asked, very carefully.

But a half second later, he knew he never should have asked that. Not with the looks on the two intruders' faces. Not with how fast they jumped to their feet.

Not with the sack they threw over his head a moment later.

And the next thing poor Father Herman knew…he was tied up and dragged right out of the room in complete and total darkness…

And in the direction of a destination that he did not even want to begin to _guess _at.

--))--

Eeeep! What has happened! What have they done? (goes running around crazily) It seems that the professional vegetable thieves are at it again. Any guesses as to who those two little sneaks were? (evil grin) Honorable Mention to anyone who names them correctly:D

**-Review Responses-**

**Almostinsane: Oh, thank you so much! (hugs) I'm really glad you liked the chapter. It was fun setting dear Father Herman up for a confession like that. (giggles) I do torture that guy…**

**Kabuki733701: Hello, mellon nin! (hugs tightly) We meet yet again! And with another _confession _at that! Isn't that something? And I must say you had me laughing very hard with that idea of dear Father Herman confessing to Saruman. Lol! And I absolutely and totally agree with you on The Stool. That little thing is going to have to play a crucial role in this story now, you just watch. (cackles) Thank you reviewing my story once again. You have no idea how much that helps me! (grovels pitifully) I'll try to update soon!**

**Lindahoyland: Aww, thank you mellon nin! (hugs) That was a very nice compliment indeed! And very relieving to hear that not only was I able to bring that guy out of retirement, but I didn't make it too boring either. Thank you! (hugs again)**

**Lina-Baggins: Oh good, another review from dear Miss Baggins! (hugs tightly) Thank you for leaving me yet another review! And I am very, very glad you liked the chapter. I do have all of your ideas stowed away, and I will see what I can do with them in the future. For now, I still have to find some way to secure Father Herman away from retirement, 'cause if he retires…well, that wouldn't be good. As you well know. (gulps) Oh, and I do thank you for the season's greetings! **


	9. UnRetirement

**Warnings: **Kidnapping, lectures, unexplained weirdness…need I go on?

**Disclaimer: **I will not comment. ;)

**A/N: **THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU to all my reviewers! You guys are my stars, my heros, my knights in shining armor, etc. etc. etc. In other words, you guys all rock. ;)

Un-Retirement 

Father Herman was not completely certain as to what was going on the entire time he was inside the sack, aside from the fact that he was being constantly bumped around, jostled, and jerked here and there across a smoothe and hard surface, and no matter how he fought, screamed, and flailed…nothing seemed to work against these two little wretched beings.

But in all other senses, he mostly just marvelled at the fact that he could not believe this was happening to him. Not after everything he had already been through. Not after he had already decided to go back to his job. Not after he had thought everything was about to starting piecing back together.

But it was happening. It was happening very much, actually. And he was being kidnapped.

"UNHAND ME YOU GOD-FORSAKEN CREATURES!" He bellowed out over and over again, completely aware that this was a very un-Godly thing to say, but he was so angry and horrified at the time that he really couldn't have cared either way. "YOU WILL HAVE YOUR JUDGEMENT AT THE END OF THE WORLD FOR THIS! THE LORD WILL JUDGE YOU SOUNDLY FOR THESE ACTIONS! NOW _LET ME OUT!_"

"Hoo, that fella' just keeps screamin' away, Merry…" The smaller one of the two spoke to the taller one, sounding almost fascinating as they continued to work together to pull the old man along to where they wanted to go. "I wonner' if he'll stop…?"

"Prob'ly not, Pip." The taller one spoke in a doomed voice, and Father Herman gave another panicked yelp when he suddenly felt the smoothe floor droop slightly into a near-slide that made him become instantly afraid that he was about to start slipping downward. But he never did. "He's jus' an old guy."

"I RESENT THAT!" Father Herman yelled out, his voice now panicky as he tried in vain to grip at the floor underneath him even while he was in the sack. "WHERE ARE YOU TAKING ME!"

"To see Gandelf!" Pip's voice said cheerfully from outside the sack, and Father Herman could have sworn he could almost _sense _Merry glaring at him. "He sayz yer real important!"

"I am not important!" The priest was almost wailing now. "I'm just an old man that wants to go home and to be LEFT ALONE! NOW _RELEASE ME!_"

"'Fraid not, sir." Merry's voice reached his ears a second later. "You have to see Gandalf first."

And truly, neither of them would say anything else despite how Father Herman shouted, pleaded, demanded, and yelled from inside the sack. For despite their size, they seemed to have a very strict sense of duty, and would not even listen to any reasoning as long as they had their objective in their heads. Such creatures Father Herman had never seen before, and was beginning to definitely think that he never wanted to see them again.

All he could hope for now that whoever this "Gandalf" fellow was, he was _not _with the sort of dark and terrible creatures that had seemed to haunt him so viciously back when he still had his job. _That _he knew he could not handle. Not right after being stalked, intruded upon, and kidnapped!

Thankfully, though, it didn't take more than a half hour or so for the little ones to finally reach their destination. That at least was a relief, but Father Herman did indeed find himself wondering just how they had managed to get him where they wanted to go when he had never felt himself leave the floor of the inn. Not even once. In fact, he was very certain they had never gone outside, or even opened a door.

But either way, they did indeed arrive where the twosome wanted to be, and a second later Father Herman felt the sack yanked right off of his head, immediately giving him a full view of the new room that he was in – which turned out to be small, dark, and made completely of stone. And needless to say, in Father Herman's book, this wasn't a very good sign.

"What is this place?" He demanded as soon as he had found his tongue, turning toward Merry and Pip, who were standing respectfully off to the side with perfectly guilty looks on their round faces. "Where have you taken me? What is going on!"

"Oh, do not worry, my good man." A sudden voice from directly behind the old man made all the little white hairs on his head stand up straight on end yet again, and when Father Herman spun around, he found himself almost nose-to-nose with the face of another old man…but this old man was smiling, and he had a long white beard and a look of merry wisdom behind his eyes. "You are in perfectly good hands. After all, if you are Father Herman, then you deserve only the best."

"What do you mean?" Father Herman found himself saying numbly, although he could have sworn his mouth never moved as he stared shakily into the other man's twinkling eyes. "You…you _kidnap _me and then tell me I am in good hands! I'll have you know that I'm – "

"Quite alarmed by it, I am sure." The other old man said with a knowing nod. "And you have every right to be so. But I assure you there was no other safe option. Not at the time. That was truly the best way to bring you here…and now that you are indeed here, how about we give you a little explanation for what has been going on?" He asked kindly.

Father Herman eyed him warily. He was guessing, with the knowledge he had obtained so far, that this fellow he was seeing before him was the _Gandalf _that Merry, Pip, and Aragorn had all spoken of to him. After all, who else would it be? He was the only other person in the room, seemed to be the one that knew everything, and did seem to have a presence that earned some reverance on the parts of those that beheld him.

Again, it was something he had never seen before. But just in case, he decided to ask.

"Are you Gandalf?" He asked, watching the other man's every move as the bearded fellow straightened himself up from where he had been bending over to look at the priest sitting on the floor.

"Oh, yes, I am." Gandalf responded simply, continuing to smile down at the priest even as he said so. "And it is an honor to have you ask me that at last. I have been searching for you for nearly a year, you know."

At this, Father Herman was most surprised. "Searching for me?" He asked in pure disbelief. "Why…why in the world were you searching for _me_? I simply do not understand what I have to do with anything – "

"- that has to do with God?" Gandalf finished, his smile growing slightly as he nodded once again. "Ah, a very good question indeed, Father. But truly, do I even need to answer that for you?"

"W-well no, not…I…but why me in particular? Do you know how many priests and other men that there are out there that are men of God?" Father Herman argued, beginning to feel a bit dizzy from the way his heart was beating. He was truly, and completely, too old for this. "You seem to be _stalking _me from what I can see…and I have yet to find out why. Why don't you just tell me what you want from me and then leave me alone?"

"Do you desire solitude so much?" Gandalf asked lightly.

"Not so much the solitude, but distance from people like _them_ – " The priest pointed insistantly toward the ever-guilty Merry and Pip. " – and the wicked beings that became the cause of my self-removal from the church is all I want. Do you have any idea the things that I _saw _those days?"

"Yes, I do." Gandalf's voice turned slightly grave as, once again, he nodded. "I know very well. And we all completely understand your reasons for leaving…but quite frankly, despite the things that have happened to you…we have come to ask you to return to the church."

Father Herman stared at him silently for a few seconds upon those words. "…are you meaning to tell me…" He began slowly, after the silence had finally and quietly broken. "…that you brought me all the way out here…to ask me to come back?"

"Perhaps." Gandalf said, his smile never fading.

"But I had already made up my mind to go back!" Father Herman insisted, now looking simply irritated as he climbed to his feet and pointed an accusing finger at the other old man. "Out of my own free will! Kidnapping was not necessary!"

"Yes it was." Gandalf argued softly. "For asking you was not the only reason that we brought you here. There are several things you must be warned of, before you return."

The priest's blood ran cold. "…warned?"

"Yes, warned." The bearded man answered. "For though most that will come to confess to you will be sincere in what they say…there may be some that will not be."

"Like Gollum. Didja' see Gollum?" Pip suddenly spoke up from the back, looking very interested indeed until Merry hissed at him.

Father Herman could not bring himself to answer. There were some memories he knew he would just rather not relive, especially at a time like this. A time when he was being informed of more danger than he was already aware of…and a time when he was already beginning to double-think his reasons for going back to the church.

"But before you fall into despair, my good man, rest assure that with God in your midst, you shall be well-protected from the worst." Gandalf's voice turned a bit more cheerful as he continued to speak even after Father Herman alerted them all to his shocked silence. "After all, there is no better protection from evil than the Lord's grace. And you, Father, most definitely have that grace. And though I wouldn't _necessarily _test my protections…"

"…like getting too close to em' or somethin'…" Merry said seriously, nodding just like Gandalf as he said so, and Father Herman was once again terribly reminded of a looming, dark figure speaking in a hissy, terrible voice outside a decorated window…

"…you should be just fine as long as you stick to your job." The old man finished with a smile still spread across his bearded face. "And rest assure that your next retirement will be far more peaceful than this one has been."

"You cannot be certain of that." Father Herman said rapidly, panic still throbbing inside of him in a way that he never would have liked to have shown outwardly…but he could feel his eye twitching even as he spoke. "No one can be certain of that."

"Perhaps not." Gandalf said, _still _smiling as he passed his staff into his other wrinkled hand and cast a small, sweeping look around the room as if he were about to leave it for an extended period of time. "But I do have something that may help prepare you."

And Father Herman watched with rounded eyes as the old man reached into a fold of his white, white robes, pulling out a folded piece of parchment a moment later, unfolding it, and then handing it to the priest with a small wink. "Go on. Look inside." He said encouragingly.

If he hadn't been so numb, the priest might not have done so. After all…what if it was something that would further tell him of what dangers were to come? But seeing as he was indeed as numb as he was, he did end up opening the parchment, and inside, written as clear as day, were these words:

_**Father Herman,**_

_**Listed below are some of the names that you may need to be aware of as you return to the church for the duty of handling Confessions. Normally I would not administer such warnings to people like you, but seeing you have dealt with everything thus far…well, I thought I owed it to you.**_

_**Note these names:**_

_**Gandalf**_

_**Sam**_

_**Gimli**_

_**Théoden**_

_**Saruman**_

…_**and there is one other that I will not name for the sake of your mental health. But this parchment is sincerely signed in honor of a respected group called the "R&R Group".**_

_**Respects to Lina Baggins the Provider, Kabuki the Inspirer, "Almost Insane" the Encourager, and Linda of Hoyland the Enheartener. **_

_**- L.S.**_

Father Herman looked up from the parchment slowly, looking over in alarm at Gandalf with an expression on his face that held many different emotions indeed.

Yes, there was absolutely, certainly, and disasterously no denying it now.

He was, officially an undeniably, doomed.

--))--

**(gasp gasp gasp) Oh my goodness, what do we have here? A conclusion about Father Herman's choice? A meeting with Gandalf? A letter from an unknown source? Oh, what could this possibly mean! Could it mean that…that ahead of us…we have more confessions! (gasp gasp) Surely it cannot be! (winks) You guys have done it yet again. And thank you all, once again, for your wonderful reviews!**

**-Review Responses-**

**almostinsane: Aw, thanks so much! (hugs)**

**Lina-Baggins: Ooohh, gotcha hook-line-and-sinker do I? (evil grin) Well, what better way to continue in this little parade than to update? Hehe. I'm so glad you're liking this so much, my friend! I sure do appreciate viewing your feedback. I'll try to update soon if the Winter Play at my school doesn't kill me too severely…**

**Kabuki733701: Yes! Goodie! I'm so glad you liked the chapter! (claps hands) I don't know what I'd do withoutcha'. If I didn't have your feedback…(eyes well up with tears) Meemeemeemee…I think I'd die. But, seeing as you have left me yet another wonderful review, I guess I can live. ;) Thank you so much for your compliments, mellon nin! I will try to update soon, and I will find SOME way to get that Stool shoved into these circumstances…(goes off to rummage through her Attic of Insane Ideas)**

**Lindahoyland: Ha! Gotcha, did I? (cackles evilly) Well, it just goes to prove that Merry and Pippin aren't exactly what they seem…meaning, they're either a lot smarter or a lot crazier than we think. (gulp) But anyway, I am VERY glad you liked the chapter, and I'll try not to keep you in suspense for too much longer:)**


	10. Love Confession

**Warnings: **Confessions! They have returned! And the madness continues!

**Disclaimer: **All right, we've reached the chapter 10 mark, so I guess it's time to review. (clears throat) IdonotownanythinginthisstoryexceptforFatherHermanandmaybethatother-priestguyeventhoughhereallyisn'tthatimportantcauseotherwiseeverythingbelongstoJRRTolkienhimself. Got that down? ;)

**A/N: **THANK YOU TO MY REVIEWERS! You guys are all lifesavers. And I've got some good news for you guys…Confessions are fully back on line! Yay! We'll just need to watch who we throw at poor old Father Herman now, won't we? (wink wink)

Love Confession 

--))--

In truth, Father Herman really didn't want to take in the full meaning of what that strange note might have meant. It could have meant things were going to get a whole lot better, or it could have meant that the end of the world was coming to his doorstep. Either way, he was far too close to a heart attack as it was than to allow himself to indulge too deeply in the terror that surely would have followed such an investigation of the note. And Gandalf seemed to be just fine with it as well, and Merry and Pip (or "Pippin", as he had recently been corrected on) seemed to be remaining completely oblivious to everything that was going on.

And it wasn't as if the dear priest didn't get a nice send-off. Oh no. Gandalf just about tele-ported him back to the good old church that he used to work at with a promise that he would be over soon to have his own confession before disappearing right into mid-air…

Leaving Father Herman quite alone in the one place that he had just about vowed never to return to after the nightmares that it had given him.

Truly, one minute he had been in the company of some of the strangest and most alarming people he had ever laid eyes on (and having just come out of a rather horrifying adventure at that)…and the next minute he was standing outside St. Matthew's church as though he had never left it.

His question now was simple. Was this a good thing or a bad thing?

Turning around slowly with a loud gulp to face the ancient, towering church that he had become so familiar with throughout most of his lifetime…Father Herman found himself facing far more than a building on that day.

He was facing an acceptance of a formerly dismissed job that very well may have had all the intentions of becoming the death of him in the very near future.

--

"H-have a seat."

A look of guilt. Uncertainty. Nervousness.

The small, wooden stool creaked whiningly in dismay when a familiar presence of weight was pressed down upon it…but nearly gave a horrified CRACK when it realized that the weight it bore was indeed one of great significance…and it had to brace itself bravely against the ground to keep from moving suddenly under the challenging pressure.

Father Herman took a very deep breath as the noises from behind the familiar, small, decorated window reached his ears and then faded into nothing, trying his very best to calm his pounding heart as he prepared to look listen to his first confession since his return to the church. He had been praying for an eternity that God would have mercy on him and send someone easy to deal with for his first day back…but you never knew with God. He most definitely worked in strange ways.

"Begin." At least he said that word without allowing his voice to wobble too much. After all, as a man with his own wisdom, he knew that the last thing a person needs while they are confessing their sins is to hear someone like the priest shaking in his robes. He just needed to keep calm, and everything would be all right. After all, hadn't Gandalf said that there would be forces watching him?

"Bless me Father, for I have sinned." The voice that came from the other side of the door was deep and gruff, and almost startled Father Herman for a moment before he realized that there was no hostility in the voice that he could hear. "I bring the sin of coveting to throne of the Lord."

The priest almost raised an eyebrow. Truly, that would have been on the list of his first guesses as to why a fellow with that kind of voice would have come to the church. But then again, God did indeed work in mysterious ways, so he guessed he was in no position to question the faith of the confessor. "And what is it that you covet, my child?" He asked, almost out of instinct a moment later as he felt his mind slowly but surely clicking back into that same, steady routine that it always had when dealing with confessions before his retirement.

"Not what, _who_." The gruff voice replied, sounding a bit gruffer and almost a bit grumpy now that it had made this correction.

The priest _did _raise an eyebrow now. "Oh, I see." He said, once again pleased that his voice came out steadily even after this rather odd revelation. "Well then, who is this that you covet, my child?"

Following this, there were a few shuffling noises and some assorted grumbling noises from outside the window, right before a few audible words were muttered, and Father Herman barely caught them due to how quiet they were and his own fading hearing.

"Lady Galadriel." Yes, those were the words. The priest ran them over in his mind several more times to make sure he had gotten it right, and he could not think of any way that he could have misheard. The name was indeed "Lady Galadriel"…but what a strange name!

Nodding softly, Father Herman finally gathered himself up in time to respond to the newcomer's comment. "And have you told her about this desire?" He asked, his eye twitching when it suddenly dawned on him that he was going to have to look out the window at sometime or other to see who was confessing. After all, if he didn't, then he would never get over his fear. But what if the speaker was something…_terrifying_?

"No." The voice grunted, but then stopped. "…w-well, not exactly. I…I mean I think she already knows, because she's some kind of witch, I think…but I-I never told her myself…"

"Mm." The priest murmured, growing a bit confused by this now, but he was relieved to feel just the slightest and firmest bit of confidence beginning to grow inside of him as the routine of the confession became more and more familiar. "And do you believe it is a sin to desire her in this way?"

Another shuffle. Another grunt.

"It depends on how you look at it." The stout figure muttered.

Father Herman shook his head slightly. "Now, that is no answer. Tell me, does she love another?"

"Yes."

"And this troubles you."

"Of course it does!"

"And how great is her love for this other man?"

"Well…she's married to him."

"Married?"

"That's what I SAID!"

The priest sat back in his seat at the mention of that one. Oh dear. This was always the area of confessions that he disliked dealing with the most. After all, wanting a woman who is married is one of the most difficult things to handle of them all.

And it was also at this point that Father Herman finally decided that it would be somewhat helpful to see what kind of fellow he was dealing with…and so, gathering about the very most of his courage and recklessness, he leaned his head forward slightly…and looked out the window.

He brought his head back almost immediately afterward, a million different shades of relief and alarm firing into his senses. All right, he had seen the fellow. And though he could have been more handsome, at least he wasn't evil looking. He was short, stout, with very long hair and a long, braided beard, and a naturally grumpy look about him, it seemed. But the idea of that kind of person desiring a lady (who carried the title of "Lady" no less) was indeed a cause for concern.

Oh dear.

"Well, this is indeed a difficult situation that you find yourself in, my child." Father Herman said, in complete honesty as soon as he had brought his wits about him again. He decided it would be best if he didn't look out the window for a while after that. "And I must say that it will grow more difficult as you try to deal with it. But as long as you have not created an physical sin yet, I believe there is still much hope left for you. What you will need is guidance of the mind and heart, and the Lord God offers the very best kind of help in those areas."

"So you advise me to pray then." The figure grumbled.

The priest frowned slightly, becoming slightly discouraged when he realized how annoyed the confessor sounded at the mention of doing such a thing. "Yes, actually I do." He said, trying to keep offense from his voice as he said so. "God will lead you on the right path. You need only seek his help. But I will tell you now that the worst thing you can do is make Lady Galadriel unhappy, or anger her husband by doing something foolish. Make your choices wisely, and perhaps turn your interests elsewhere. You may find that the world will turn a different direction in all good time."

More shuffling. More grumbles, this time more annoyed.

Silence followed this.

And then the irritated sound of a heavy boot thumping on the ground before the stout figure pushed himself to his feet, and stomped off away from the door where he had formerly been sitting and talking to the old priest.

Leaving Father Herman alone at last, letting out a long, long sigh of relief…but also with a feeling of hope that his first confession had gone fairly well.

Perhaps.

After all, God worked in mysterious ways, and he had yet to see if that would be the worst kind of confessor that he would face in the future…

--))--

Yahoo! The first confession after his retirement! I hope it doesn't all seem too boring after all this terribly long time…but you guys said you wanted more confessions, and I only live to make my reviewers happy! (goes around and hugs all of her reviewers) You guys are the best! (Aaaand, special thanks to Kabuki for the Gimli idea! It was fun! (claps wildly))

**-Review Responses- **

**almostinsane: Ohh, so you want to BE in a confession, do you? Hmm…well, that's a little bit different, because I never really planned to put anyone outside of the story in there…(rubs chin)…I'll have to take that into consideration…hehe. (winks) I'll see what I can do. Thanks for your awesome review, as always:)**

**lindahoyland: HA! I knew that word would get me sometime! (thwacks head) I've ALWAYS had trouble spelling "smooth". Thanks very much for correcting me, and I'll try not to make that mistake again. (goes off to go study vocab) I always had trouble with the word "disciplin" too. (shakes head) I don't even know if I spelled that right…and I'm very glad you liked the new chappie! It's refreshing to get back to confessions again, and I was more than happy to pay a little honor to my reviewers. But then again, didn't I say something about "Honorable Mention"…? (hint hint)**

**goatzrul: Ohh…I see. Well, I'm sorry you don't like the story, but that is also why there is a general statement in the authoring realm stating that if you _don't _like the story, you _don't _have to read it. I also mentioned that my story _is _a little strange, and therefore your issues with Elrond are understandable (by the way, it is part of the Catholic tradition that priests are known as "Fathers", and therefore everyone else is kind of considered "children", and that's why he called Elrond "my child"), but that is also why this is _not _a canon story, and I myself officially marked it "weird". If you don't like stories that are out of the ordinary, then you are absolutely right about thinking that you should not read this. And you actually don't need to tell me about Elrond. I've read up on him quite a bit, and come to think of it, he probably wouldn't be able to get into this modern-day-time,would he? Of course not. The priest came from my own imagination, and I'm sorry if that offends you. Go ahead and go back to writing your essay, and please try to leave a little _constructive criticism _on your next visit, if you have a next one. Otherwise it just makes it sound like you're trying to make me feel bad about my story, and makes you sound a little bit mean. Thanks for stopping by.**

**Kabuki733701: Yes! Another good correction about the word "smooth". Almostinsane mentioned it before, and as I said then, I've ALWAYS had trouble spelling that word. (shakes head) Totally my bad. Thanks for telling me! Oh, and as far as Father Herman goes, it's all part of the Gandalf-made-mystery as to how he got where he is now. (spooky look) Heeheehee…and of _course _you're The Inspirer! Every one of my reviewers has a special place, and judging from your titles, looks like you all know where that place is now! Lol! And don't worry about not having any ideas at the moment. I've got enough to keep me sustained for a while. (wink) Thanks for the review, mellon nin!**

**Lina-Baggins: Lol! Well, I'm glad I have your permission. (giggles) Thank you for yet another kind review! I totally agree with you about Merry and Pippin as well. They are ADORABLE, and I really had fun sticking them in there. Like I told almostinsane, it's good to be doing confessions again. I'll see you at the next update! (goes off whistling down the path)**


	11. Corruption Confession

**Warnings: **Yet another confession! And this time with royalty again! Should be fairly interesting…

**Disclaimer: **Need I even say it?

**A/N: **Once more, THANK YOU TO ALL MY REVIEWERS! You guys keep me going even under the threat of the dreaded Writer's Block…which is really awesome. Thank you!

Corruption Confession 

--))--

"Have a seat."

A look of guilt. Uncertainty. Nervousness.

The stool braced itself in pure intimidation as the figure above it descended upon it slowly…and became almost instantly relieved when it found that the weight was not nearly what it had been before. It was still a burden, but at least it felt like it could hold it this time.

The priest on the other side of the small, decorated window sighed slightly to himself as he sat down on his own chair, wincing slightly when his back gave a small protest to the motion, but otherwise seeming just fine with the situation as he prepared to hear the confession of the day. His last confession had gone fairly well, so he was feeling a bit more confident now, and at least he wasn't hearing any strange noises from the other side of the wall. That, he was certain, was all that would be needed to get him shaking all over again.

"Begin."

And so it did.

"Bless me Father, for I have sinned." The voice from the other side of the wall was older, but very remorseful and very soft, and therefore very relieving to the priest's ears. He already knew the name of the fellow that was confessing that day, but to hear that he didn't sound like a monster was still very relieving. "I bring the sin of corruption before the throne of the Lord."

The priest's relief stilled slightly, and froze inside of his mind as he slowly processed that word in his mind. Corruption. Didn't that mean…the process of turning corrupt? Evil?

Now feeling his relief beginning to disappear, Father Herman swallowed very hard before finally speaking in response to the man's words. "C-corruption, my child?" He asked, his voice wobbling just at the very beginning of his words due to a growing knot forming in his stomach. "…do you mean…you have turned to the devil's wishes instead of those of the Lord your God?"

"Not of my own volition, Father." The voice spoke softly. "'Twas the press of evil itself upon me…but I believe I could have fought harder against the force that pushed me. It caused me to do terrible things."

"Such as?" In truth, that was the last thing the priest wanted to ask at that time, but he knew it was necessary for the sake of the confession…and it made him feel completely ill.

"I sat in silence as my son lay dying." A bit more sadness had touched the voice now, and somehow caused the priest to feel a bit less uneasy at the sound of the true regret in the mournful tone. "I sent my nephew into exile for reasons that were purely unjust. I failed my people. I failed them as their king…"

"Ah." Father Herman nodded slowly as Théoden named these things, but he could not help but feel relieved that those seemed to be the worst of the things that he had done…and it did not sound as though he had done them of his own free will. "And do you believe that this…force was, in a sense, _possessing _you?"

"Like a demonic possession?" The voice asked softly, but some of the sadness was gone at the mention of such a thing.

"Yes." The priest answered bravely.

"Oh, it was no demon that caused me to do these things, Father." Théoden answered quietly. "It was Saruman the White, and his servant, Grima Wormtongue. One of which used to be in my service. Somehow they were able to gain control of my mind, and changed me almost completely…"

"So then this is still not happening at the present time, is it?" Father Herman asked, purely dying to know the answer to this particular question, as it would tell words for how alarmed he should be feeling at the moment. At least he was safe in sanctuary, though…perhaps…

"No, it is not." Théoden answered. "Both Saruman and Grima are now dead. I still feel the weight of the guilt that comes with the deeds I have done, though. I still feel that I could have prevented it, had I not been so blind…"

"One man alone is often no match for the forces of evil, my child." The priest said gently, his heart suddenly going out to the confessor as he became more sure of the situation and began to realize what he was going through. "I doubt there was much of anything that you could have done. What matters now is that you are no longer in the shadow of that evil, and you may now take the time that you need to make right of the things that you made wrong. Is your family still with you?"

"Yes…all but my son."

"Then they must be telling you the same thing I am. Do not press yourself with this guilt. Bring it before the Lord, for he makes all things knew. Allow your heart to be cleansed, and start over again. You may find that there is more in the hands of God that cannot be in our hands than you think."

The man was silent then, but Father Herman could tell he was considering his words. Ah, how glad he was to see a confessor like this again! Someone who truly regretted their actions, and was truly a good person at heart. It was very refreshing after some of the others that he had seen.

"Very well, Father." Théoden spoke in his normal, soft voice a moment later, and the priest heard the stool creak a bit as the man stood up, crossed himself, and turned to make his way slowly but deliberately toward the tower of the church, where he was undoubtedly going to pray.

As soon as he was gone, Father Herman sat back slowly against his seat, closed his eyes, and let out a long breath. So, confession number two was done. And it hadn't been as bad as he had dreaded at all. God was truly watching over him, and he prayed that he would continue to make things as easy for him as possible…but then again, of course, God works in strange ways.

And it was with this thought in mind that the priest at last stood from his seat, crossed himself as well, and made his way carefully out of the small room and along the stone path toward the sanctuary, where he himself planned to pray for a good part of the day.

Yes, that sounded very good to him. After all, a little prayer never did anything but a world of good.

--))--

**Yay! The next confession is complete! Théoden was a blast in this one. Thanks to Lina-Baggins for the wonderful idea! (hugs) Oh, and just in case anyone is wondering, I don't do the confessions in the order of which I received the ideas from my (spectacular) reviewers, but instead in the order of which I think would fit the story best. Just so no one gets confused! (waves helpfully)**

**-Review Responses-**

**almostinsane: Thanks! Oh, and if you don't mind, if I do end up including you, I will need to know a few basic things for _detail _purposes. (grin) These are the questions: what color is your hair? Your eyes? Do you mind if your personally isn't exactly matched? Is there a name for yourself that you would like me to use instead of your penname? With that, I think I should have enough, just in case I stick you in a chapter somewhere along the line here. (wink) Thanks for your review!**

**Lina-Baggins: Oh mellon nin, your compliments always brighten my day…even though I hardly feel worthy of them. (bashful smile) I am SO glad that you think I did I good job on Gimli! Really, I do get worried about how I am managing the characters, and it means a lot to hear that I'm doing an O.K. job. (hugs Lina tightly) I always liked John Rhys-Davies too, especially his voice! He has an amazing way of talking…and speaking of talking, I agree with you on the flamers deal. (shakes head sadly) I was really hoping I had made it clear in my profile that I really don't want any flames, as I have never flamed anyone else, and it just goes to show how unkind some people are. I mean, constructive criticism I have always appreciated, but flames just make me feel bad. Anyway, I won't take up your time reading this any longer! (musters up smile) Thanks again for your Théoden idea, and I will try to update soon!**

**Kabuki733701: Oh, thank you so much! (hugs) It's very good to know that you liked the chapter! Yeah, doing Gimli was fun. I imagine he's always been pretty touchy on the subject of Galadriel, and now he actually admits it!…well, sort of. (winks) And _Grima _did you say? Excellent idea! I'll store the idea away in my Folder right away. And you're certainly right about the Stool! He'll have a few extra creaks and a crack after that…after all, dwarves are nice, but they can be pretty heavy. See you at the next update, mellon nin! (waves)**

**Lindahoyland: Ha! Gave you a little surprise did I? Well, that's always refreshing once in a while…at least that's what I think. Hehe. I'm glad you liked the chapter! It's always nice to know that. (grins) And yeah, you have a point about that "courtly love" thing. Father Herman would have to learn a thing or two before dealing with that completely…but at least he survived it. Thanks for your review, mellon nin!**


	12. Jealousy Confession

**Warnings: **Yet another confession, and with yet another familiar character!

**Disclaimer: **I vill not speeek… ;)

**Author's Notes: **As usual, thank you SO much to all of my reviewers, and my apologies for the huge gap in the update:( I really feel awful leaving you guys hanging like that... (sighs) Oh well. Hopefully things will return to an orderly fashion soon…despite how grim things look now…at least I was able to get this chapter up though, right? (looks around with a half-hearted smile)

Jealousy Confession 

--))--

"Have a seat."

A look of guilt. Uncertainty. Nervousness.

The stool gave a distressed little creak as some considerable weight was added to its three small legs. The weight wasn't quite as unbearable as it had been with the stout being that had sat on it before, but it was still enough to make it feel a little bit uncertain. Oh well. Hopefully this would be a short confession today.

This sort of thought, however, did not cross Father Herman's mind today as he sat down behind the decorated window in the tiny room that he had become very familiar with throughout his lifetime, feeling in a better mood than he had felt in a long time, simply because he had already stolen a glimpse at the small fellow outside the window that was going to be confessing today, and he could almost immediately tell that he posed no threat. Phew!

And so, with that, the priest straightened his robes slightly, cleared his throat, and spoke in a nice, calm voice.

"Begin."

"Bless me Father, sir, for I have sinned." The guilty and nervous voice responded from the other side of the window, and the sandy-colored head bent slightly as he spoke, as though ashamed of what he was about to say. "I bring the sin of jealousy before the Lord, sir."

The priest almost smiled. Jealousy. This was a _very _common case in the matters of confessions, and certainly nothing that he couldn't handle. "Ah, jealousy." He spoke smoothly, nodding to himself as he did so. "A common sin that we all bring before the Lord many times in our lives, though we cannot justify it by saying such."

A solemn nod came from the small figure, and the priest continued.

"And what has caused this jealousy, my child?" He asked.

There was hesitation from the small one outside.

"…m-my master, Father, sir."

"Your master? So you serve him then?"

"W-well, not exactly, I mean, I suppose I – "

"Ah, do not bother getting into detail. It is all right just knowing who he is. Now, what has he done to cause this jealousy?"

"Well…you see…a while ago we went on this mission to go save the world…you know, destroy evil and all. I was with him every step of the way, and yet he gets all the glory, sir!"

"Glory?"

"Yes, sir! Praise, honor, worship, _glory!_ I mean, I know he was the one to actually _carry _the Ring…but without me, he would've _died!_"

"Ah…and has your master shown that he is not grateful for your deeds?"

"…well…no…but still, I think I deserve more from other people. He has all the wealth, all the fame…even a one-way ticket to Valinor with the elves! Believe me, Father, sir, I respect Mr. Frodo, and I know what he did for the world…but sometimes…"

"You just feel angry that you are slightly ignored in his shadow."

"Yes…yes, I suppose…"

"Have you talked with him about this?"

"Oh no, sir! The last thing Mr. Frodo needs is another weight on his shoulders."

"So you think he would feel betrayed by what you feel?"

"W-well, I don't rightfully know…"

"All the more reason to ask him, Samwise."

"But what if he starts to hate me?"

"If you saved his life, I strongly doubt that he will."

"You'd be surprised, sir…"

"Well, I cannot force you to ask him, and if your heart simply refuses the idea, then you should not do it. After all, the pressure to do something like that often leads to very severe arguments."

"…a-arguments, sir?"

"Never mind. Have you prayed to the Lord about this?"

"Of course, sir!"

"Well, why don't you pray again? Pray for guidance and for a clean heart to be able to take all of this into consideration, and also for strength to see yourself through this jealousy. After all, though you may feel some anger toward the others for their refusing to recognize you, it is not your master's fault, and you should never make it seem like it is."

The small figure shuffled his feet slightly on the sturdy, wooden floor. "But what if I become to jealous to be around him anymore? Don't you think he would think that I hated him?"

"Definitely." The priest responded in all honesty. "Unless you told him the truth about why you could not spend time with him anymore…and if you are going to do that, why not just talk about it with him before that need for seperation happens?"

Sam swallowed hard, glancing around the church before heaving a great sigh. "I suppose you're right. Maybe I'll talk to him about it tonight…and then bash everyone else tomorrow."

Father Herman raised an eyebrow. "…bash?"

"Never mind, Father, sir." Sam responded, standing up from the stool and crossing himself quickly before turning to leave. "Priests have a hard time understandin' that kind of stuff."

"Do not forget to pray, my child!" Father Herman called after him, his voice slightly worried as he watched the hobbit go. That one had a potential for some very nasty thoughts or some danger to others, that was certain. Even though he didn't really seem like the warrior-type of person…well, you could never tell what anger might lead someone to do.

There was no response from the retreating figure, and the priest sank back in his seat with a shake of his head. Oh well. It could have gone worse, he knew that at least. But one thing that confused him was the fact that he could have _sworn _that he had heard the name "Frodo" once before…and not just from someone's casual mouth, but from personal experience…

Hm.

Oh well. It would probably come to him before long…either that, or his memory loss was merely another sign of old age.

Shaking his head yet again to himself, Father Herman sat back comfortably in his confession chair and folded his hands on his slightly rounded stomach before closing his eyes and just relaxing. Another confession that day was done, and he was actually feeling up for another one, since things had gone so well.

Then again…was it dangerous to think such things?

--))--

Yay! Chapter 12! And there went SAM! Thanks so much to Lina-Baggins for the idea, and I will try to get another one up there as soon as I can…but like I said before, I can't garauntee much. (looks around miserably) Oh well. Thank you all for being so patient!

**-Review Responses-**

**almostinsane: Okay…(documents everything) Got it! Thanks for the info! I'll be sure to keep all that in mind if I can get that chappie up. And thanks for your compliments on the chapter too! This was another fun one. Seeya at the next update…and hopefully it won't be too far away!**

**Kabuki733701: Oh, mellon nin, you always make me feel so…so…(sniffs dramatically) SPECIAL! (hugs tightly) Really, your comments are so lifting. I'm glad you liked this confession! And it's funny, because I really thought this was a particularly sad one too. I mean, that guy has been through a lot in his life, and he really is a good king, ya know? (sighs) Oh well. At least he's going to seek help from God now. That'll do him some good. And ÉOWYN you say! FanTASTIC idea! No, seriously. I'm sure we'll be able to come up with something workable for her as soon as I have time to write again, because she will actually be the first female to confess in this story, unless Arwen beats her to it somehow. (winks) Thanks for the idea! And as you can see, I did delete goatzrule's review. Hehe. I totally forgot to do that, because I had to use it to make my review-response in that one chapter. Thanks for the reminder, and it IS relieving to get that ridiculous thing off of MY page. (folds arms firmly) So there. Thanks for being patient while waiting for the update, too! **

**Lindahoyland: Oh, thank you so much for the compliments on the chapter. (blushes) I'm so glad you liked it! And yeah, I thought it was a little sad too. Poor Theoden. I'm sure there really is a ton of stuff that he regrets…and Father Herman may be one of the few people to know it. (sniffles) Anyway though, thanks for being so patient while waiting for the update! I sure did miss you guys! And I hope it won't be too long before I can update again…**


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